20 Things You Don't Want to Hear at a Nuclear Power Plant

1. Fission-shmission, relax, I'll increase the water level after my coffee break.

2. Was the "Open valve A and close valve B" or was it the other way around?

3. This whole plant will be running under Windows 95 tomorrow.

4. HEY! Is smoke coming out of the core normal?

5. Who forgot to pay the water bill?

6. We got 12 seconds to WHAT???

7. Meet your new plant superintendent: Homer Simpson

8. A leak? Can't you fix it with duct tape or something?

9. Oh yeah! 50 bucks says I can make it blow.

10. It's Russian technology.

11. Move over Three Mile Island - here we come!!!

12. Sniff, sniff... you smell that?

13. I used to work at Chernobyl.

14. All the way to the RIGHT, not LEFT you dummy!

15. It's your turn to wax the core.

16. How come all the big shots are leaving?

17. Is that a 60 minute file crew out there?

18. Is this part really necessary?

19. OF COURSE I went to high school. Didn't finish it though.

20. Look at the good news, we are going to find out whether people actually glow in the dark.

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